It takes times to think about a certain important topic that might make you think about it in a way you feel closer to reality. Funny how I kept wandering around for topics when I never realised I kept looking at it every day. The COVID19 deaths around the world seem consistent but there's been a slow decrease in most of the countries. This brings me to an important topic I always shy away from because I never really learned how to take things seriously for once in a literal way - that being, Death.
One of the common points that has me wondering is, what is death? Is it important? If it is then why are we alive? Are we living the right way? Well, I've got all my questions answered thanks to my Deen (Way of Life) which makes it so simple to understand the concept of life but, that's not my point. The point being, is death really so powerful that makes someone who hasn't thought about life at all makes them live it to the fullest? I seriously have no idea because I never was in such a scenario.
I've always wondered, why do people fall into Depression? Why do people become mentally sick sometimes? Does it have to do with not being fed with positive thoughts? Does it have to do with thoughts at all? I never was able to answer them with a 100% certainty because people are of different types and minds, making the concept of psychology very complex (Kudos to the Psychiatrists who found out ways to help someone out of depression) and I don't feel like there can be an easy answer for it.
The fact that a friend you've been with for a long time, spends time with you, eats with you and has the best conversations with you, might be under the rope of depression and you, not knowing about it, think he's living the time of his life, is so hard to realise. I've been to the final gathering of many known ones I've been in touch with for a long time. Yet, I don't feel that pain after they passed away. Is it because I'm flawed? Or is it because I've not known them or understood them clearly? I can never know.
When it comes to the topic of Depression and Mental stress, it's always the Asian countries that are facing the worst of it. Why you ask? It's because of the toxic culture descended to our parents who've shoved down the thought that "Not thinking about it will make it fade away". People are of different kinds, including being mentally weak or mentally strong yet we ignore this fact ourselves. Not that the parents are to be blamed because they've too, at one point were kids who were shoved the thought of "No such thing as Mental status" down their throats. The only thing I can give is Sympathy and Pity rather than hate. There's already too much hate running wild in the world.
You, your family, your friends, do you ever think about what would happen next if one of them were to meet their demise in such an unexpected moment? Would your be able to take in the reality of death? I, personally, would have no idea what I'd do if someone from my family or friends were to meet their demise that way, God forbid. I'd rather pass away myself earlier than having to see anyone facing death. I guess it's just my fear of facing grievance that's speaking and not my woke self. I don't know.
If you've been in a scenario of losing a beloved, what would be your advice to the ones who're struggling to cope through it? It would be a golden advice for those taking it too hard on themselves.
Coming to reality, they've started opening up the shops and malls and I just came across a post that crossed all levels of stupidness. People standing in line at the theatre's and the malls to enter inside for the first time after 6 months. Like bro, why would you risk your life after surviving successfully for 6 months? Maybe they lost their minds in the process of survival. I don't know, ask Bear Grylls.
As days pass, I'm slowly starting to thank this Virus (not for killing millions) because it made us (me atleast) understand the unhealthy habits and flaws I was following which would have been a definite speed breaker in my slow progressing life. It's hard to keep your life progressive when you have consistent potholes and pitfalls that takes time to get up from. Atleast I understand now.
I don't know if it's too long or too short because I can only write about how much knowledge I have about a certain topic. My mistakes have been many and yes I'm learning to not make them again.
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COMMENT DOWN BELOW ON WHAT YOU THINK CAN BE A WAY TO INSTANTLY IDENTIFY DEPRESSION? ALSO WRITE ME YOUR THOUGHTS ON DEATH AND HOW IT CAN AFFECT SOMEONE'S LIFE. THANK YOU FOR GIVING IT A READ. I APPRECIATE IT.
5 Comments
Deep . Gud write up though..
ReplyDeleteThank you for checking it out.
DeleteThere's nothing in built in the brain. You feed it to shape it the way you want. Yes, except for the IQ level, brain is just a storage house that stores memories along with information. Coming to the lead, what exactly depression means? To instantly identify depression, one may argue to note the change in behaviour or lifestyle and characteristic graph of a certain person or at the extreme, the decision to end their life, these all are results of what they define depression. The people having depressive thoughts and views would fall into even deeper pit of sorrow if they are told that there's nothing like depression ( not the cliche taunt here). Yes, it is only some thoughts, or incidents that cling onto the brains of people. It is how YOU think. Let me cite few examples, your brain sees and resultantly responds according to how YOU want it to. It doesn't function to take decisions on its own unless YOU permit it to. For if something is bothering you, just paint the new thoughts over it to not get time to think about it. (Not repeating that parents' careless views). This is the last step to do which parents ask their children to try in the starting itself. Before doing so, one must try the possible means to solve their problem. The people driven by "depression" simply make their life revolve around a certain thing, person, place or incident. It is only their THOUGHTS or recurrence of the incidents whether virtually in their minds or practically in their lives. They retain it in their brain which starts forgetting everything else and starts highlighting the particular point. Brain keeps the information which you make it seem important to it. Have you ever wondered why we don't remember anything from our age under 3 or 4? If a child is separated from his parents in that age, he would not be able to recognise them later in his life after years. Why? At that age, the child never taught its brain the important things or people to memorise them all. Even when grown up, we don't remember each and every second's activity. Try to recall. Simply, not everything is saved in our brains. Just as how many ever notes you type in your computer, the folder will show only the ones you have "saved".
ReplyDeleteOkay, to explain this, here is the beginning step. A child's brain starts developing while in the womb itself. The type of thoughts mother has or the conversations around the foetus or the way the mother is felt, all affects the brain of the child. When two siblings have the same parents, same environment, same school, same culture, same language, still they have different perspectives and personalities! Yes their brains are fed with same information but it depends on them to retain the type of information and make it their memory. They view things differently and thus have different opinions.
Another example, if you are asked to enlist the attires you put on over the past ten particular days, you will surely be unable to do it because it's unnecessary to note it down but surely you'd remember the dress of your last birthday! Simply because it was special and you made it one of your happiest memories. The point is, brain remembers all that you want it to remember. Why not drive your thoughts the best way? Yes, it is at times cumbersome to start afresh but answer this one, can you explain the one who made you fall into depression? It's only the one who suffers can take decision to get out of it because YOU DON'T HAVE ANY RIGHT ON OTHER PERSON. You cannot force them to understand you. You can only force yourself to explain and to lead your life in a better way. Generally people do not use the right they have on themselves rather they try to make the things work from other side.
Yes, forgetting is not in your hands, but oversaving the new thoughts definitely is. I'd define depression as the “revision of the worst of your memories”.
Death is inevitable. The best opinion is to accept it. I have two phases of death. One practical and the other is emotional.
ReplyDeleteStarting with practical, if I am asked my personal notion, it's rare that I pray for someone's long life. Very rare. Not that I wish for their death or I don't want them to live. Maybe I sound stupid to most of the people or insane or whatever but I believe there's much above that one needs than long life. I rather ask for "internal peace" than to delay someone's death.
There's always a part in someone's life which is known to their deepest secrets of their Hearts. We may never imagine the pain inside. There's no one special other than Allaah for believers, what great can be except to meet their Rabb for them? As for the ones who do not believe in afterlife, then this lowly World is all they can turn into their Hell and even Heaven. They mustn't get disappointed, for the ones who love this World and never want to leave this place, they must be ambitionless.
Practically speaking, a woman who is raped a several times would not want to live any longer. Just to stick her broken self confidence and to make her seem stronger, she may "live" but "to live" is not want she would wish for herself! I'd rather wish for her internal peace and to boost up her strength to face the World.
A woman who is mentally, physically and emotionally abused by her husband must not wish for her long life. I'd rather wish for her internal peace. She might live with a smile on her face for her children but she is not at peace. Not that she needs death but she needs something more than long life.
You cannot prostrate after death, you cannot repent after death, you cannot ask forgiveness after death. All what you've got is this life to do whatever you wish to. I'd rather pray for the moment of realisation for the people in need.
A man who is verbally or mentally tortured by the society to get a job within a time span or a baby for that matter needs something more important than long life. I believe there's a special moment in which Du'as are accepted. Your words are made reality. I'd not want to miss it for asking long life when one needs more than that.
Heading towards emotional side, the dilemma is what exactly have you asked on people coping through the phase of their beloved's death? Is it the ways they can lessen the pain or the ways to move on? Purely emotional concept, one is never going to get over the pain on someone's death. If someone asked me to console in times like these, I'd never stop anyone from crying or however they express their pain because even after ten years, they will feel the same pinch in their heart. I don't feel like crying on someone's death nor do I force myself to shed tears to show I felt bad. I don't know why but I don't believe this World my destination. Except for that person won't be able to pray, repent, prostrate, I don't really feel bad. To miss them is another thing but often people are still emotionally miles away even when alive! About the ones who are close to that person, they don't know what is best for them, Only Allaah does, so the best is to make Du'a for their beloved.
Yes, when a person dies, people around them feel extremely bad, for they love them, are habitual of them, cannot imagine their life without them but can they come out of their selfish bubble to think once what they must’ve hidden inside their hearts? Or that they have finally reached to the One who they belong to? Maybe nothing can match their pain of separation but would they feel less bad if they lost their beloved after few more years? No human decides the life span of a person.
It still is not that simple because emotions work different than words do!
Thank you for your insights. That was very detailed. 😂👍🏽
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